Every Relationship has its challenges (Ups and Downs of relationships and how to manage them)

We all want our relationships to prosper. Everyone wants to be happy in it. That is obvious the main reason why people get into these relationships. You have to understand that everything has its own challenges. Don’t expect a smooth path when the course of your relationship is deep and real. Every relationship has its up and downs. People rise and fall in relationships. If you want your relationship to survive these challenges you have to be ready to manage them no matter the cost.

You will never be happy forever in a relationship. We are humans, we will never be perfect. We have flaws within us. We may pretend everything within us is perfect, but the truth of the matter is that deep down we know we have so much we are ashamed of to share. The moment you decide to get in a relationship, a serious thing with someone be ready to accept them for who they are and accommodate them in your heart.

The start of it (relationship) it can be a paradise on earth. The warm hugs, cuddles, kisses, support, night dinners and the strolls around the city together while holding hands. It might make you think that things will stay that way forever. You might pray for it to last without problems and chaos. We all know that feeling we get when we stare the person we love and care about.

You just feel so hard to let that person go. You feel so attached to them. You may only want his/her company around you so that you can feel the warmth of their love deep within your heart. All this is happening to you because love is deep within both of you.

As love continues to grow deep so as the challenges creeps in it. Challenges are obvious in every relationship. Theses ups and downs in a relationship aren’t a bad thing at all. The challenges make the relationships stronger to those who know how to manage them.

It’s through ups and downs of the relationships where we can be able to understand the kind of person we have in our lives. Don’t get deceived by the gifts and night candle dinners that she/he makes to for you. The true nature of your bae will come in during the time of difficulties. Someone might tell you that he/she loves you and he/she is ready for anything. Be it for better or for worse.

Words can build a castle and break it. Don’t think too much of the words someone tells you, just look the way he/she handles the challenges that you both go through them.

Anyway, let me talk some of the challenges that you can go through in relationship and how to go handle them. The way we solve these problems that we face in our relationships determines how we are going to keep our relationship candle on.

You can’t run away from the difficulties you are facing in your relationship. Running from them will never bring you any solution. Even if you decide to get someone else, he/she will also have his/her own faults.

These are the some of the challenges in a relationship.

People quarrel and fight in a relationship.

Whether you accept this fact or deny it that is the point. People get into a real fight in relationships. These fights can be caused by very petty issues. When you quarrel with your partner, it doesn’t mean that that is the end of your relationship. You have to understand that everyone has his/her own moods. We both know that moods will never be the same in every single day.

The argument may even go deep to a point that no one of you will be able to take back the words he or she said. During the wrangle one of you might spit some words that might hurt as hell…

When he/she say these words to hurt you, it doesn’t mean he/she doesn’t love you. When people are angry they can do and say things that they never meant. We all know how emotions can take control of our own actions when we are annoyed. You have to know these are the ups and downs of relationships and these are what make your relationship stronger.

It might go to an extent where you will get into real fight. Breaking dishes when you are both disappointed. When people are angry especially the short-tempered people might do some mess that you will never even imagine if they would be capable of doing them. When it comes to such a point that is where the true nature of you partner will be revealed.

This is a challenge that both of you should know that it can happen in your relationship. You will argue and fight, but the best thing is to find a way forward to solve the misunderstandings that arose up.

How to manage it;

When it happens to you in your relationship you have to understand it’s normal for couples to argue and fight in relationships. You can’t run away from this. No matter how much you guys love each just remember that one day you will end up in a fight.

You have to know how to solve this problem or else you might lose him or her. How can you manage this when it happens?

You will have to be calm. Comprehend that is one of the ups and downs of relationships. This happens not to you only but also to the rest of the lovers. The more you fight with your partner the more stronger the relationship gets. When you get into a fight you will be able to identify what made the fight to happen. In this way you will be bale to understand what annoys your partner that badly.

Identify the problem and sit down with your boo. Let him/her tell you why he/she is pissed off. Both of you need to be open in order for this to work. Share everything that made you guys get into that fight. After you have identified it, then it time to check whether that matter was worth for the fight you had.

Sometimes when you discuss the cause of your fight in a relationship you will realize it wasn’t a matter worth to fight for. This happens because both of you were too angry at each other. So, when you find the theme that made you guys to get into that fight, now it’s time to find the clarification for it. Let him/her say how she/he wants the problem to be solved.

If it’s a problem that you made it to happen, learn to accept the fact that you were wrong. Apologize and feel sorry for what happened. When you accept that you are the cause of that fight. Explain to him/her and let her/him know that won’t happen again. Don’t let your ego be above you. It doesn’t hurt to accept that you are on the wrong side.

Moods swing.

This is another challenge that tends to affect relationships. It can make a relationship status to change from serious to complicated. You have to know that someone’s attitude will never remain the same. I’m talking about the frame of one’s mind. Don’t expect someone to be always in the same shape of mind. People get angry, annoyed, depressed, gloomy and frustrated.

All these negative moods might happen to him or her without any reason. They can change someone to a person you have never seen before. In most cases these moods they might arise from nothing. You may have done nothing for him or her to change his/her moods. This is something that happens all over a sudden.

Someone wakes up in the morning and looks gloomy for the rest of the day. In such a case he/she will not want to do anything with you. This is a challenge that creeps in the middle of nowhere. When this happens you might think that he or she has changed her/his feelings for you. You might think he/she found someone else and he/she wants to break up with you.

It can make a relationship go at its worst. She/he might wake up and forget even if you ever existed. She/he will ignore your texts and leave you hanging. These negative moods swings can make someone think that the relationship is going to an end.

How to manage it;

Moods fluctuate. You have to understand that. When this happens all over a sudden to your partner and he or she doesn’t to have you around, just give him/her a space. Sometimes people need their time alone to think of the life situation they are in.

It can happen to you, in one way or another; I know you have once experienced it. There are times where you wake up in the morning and you don’t feel like saying hi to anyone, even your own parents. The only thing you want is to be alone in a calm space.

Some people when they have these negative moods swing they prefer to spend their time sleeping. Everyone has his or her own way of handling moods fluctuations. When this happens to him/her just give her space. Don’t bring negative thoughts to her behavior. Ask her/him if he/she needs anything from you. When she/he say that he/she wants nothing just leave her. She/he will be okay with time. This is something normal that happens. Note! If this takes more than two days then know that there is a huge problem with your partner. Start to identify what’s wrong with her before it’s too late.

People cheat in relationship.

This is another one of the challenge that mostly ruins many relationships. People cheat. We are humans and we all have flaws. Temptations do happen sometimes. You may be completely comfortable with your partner and yet later you can find yourself or your partner cheating.

I know you may say that this is not one of the ups and downs of relationships. This is a challenge that most of the people fail to get through. When one comes across his or her partner cheating the only way out he/she thinks of is a break up. Break up is not a solution to solve these challenges of infidelity in relationships. Even if you decide to get into another relationship with someone else, this will also happen again.

There are many reasons that can make someone to commence on cheating her/his partner. I gave some of the reason why men cheat in relationships in Life Blogger ( 5 Reasons Why Men Cheat In Relationships). If you read that article you will get to understand that. I’m not trying to justify cheating as a good thing in a relationship. Cheating is something that has to be avoided at all cost. Despite of that, you have to understand that people can make some mistakes and it is from them they can learn and change.

Girls can cheat too due to several reasons too. So, this is a very serious challenge that many of people face in relationships. Many fail to have the stomach to handle it.

How to manage this;

I want to give you a way in which you can manage this challenge. I know you have met couples who have been dating for almost six years. They look so great together and so happy. You have to understand that doesn’t come at any cost. Do you want to tell me that these people dated for all those years without finding out one had infidelity.

As I said earlier when you get into a fight with your partner and sit down and solve this problem, you will begin to understand your partner more. The same case, when your partner cheats and you find out doesn’t jump into conclusions. Try to reason with him or her and try to find out why he or cheated. Let her or him tell you what made him or her to go to such an edge. If you two still love each other deeply you can solve this puzzle.

We have a case where your partner cheats and he or she doesn’t feel sorry about it, when it comes to such a stage just end that relationship. If someone takes pride in something wrong that he/she did, then it’s obvious that he or she was never deep into that relationship. He or she might have been using you to get what he or she wanted.

When it happens that your partner feels so sorry about the mess he/she did. Listen to him or her and understand why it happened. Try with him or her to solve the issue that made it to occur. If you guys still love each other you will come to conclusion. The moment you will be able to solve this problem the more stronger your relationship will be.

To conclude, every relationship has its own challenges, ups and downs. This will always be there as long as you guys are into a serious thing and you both want go somewhere with it. The course of true relationship will never run smoothly.

If your partner is broke in anyway learn how to fix him or her. Support him or her in any way you can. The situation that your lover has right now it will not be forever. Help him or her get through it. True love doesn’t need much than attention, care, time, trust, honesty and love and affection. The rest of the things will flow smoothly if these are achieved.

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Originally published at https://herbeautyonly.blogspot.com on October 12, 2020.

Hello, I'm Abduljabar from Mombasa, Kenya. I'm a passionate blogger and a friendly man. Here is my blogs herbeautyonly.blogspot.com (Her Beauty)